NEW-FANGLED ELECTRONIC GADGETS AND DOO-DADS

I recall trying to get my aging parents interested in computers.  Dad took NO interest at all, and smiled indulgently before dropping into a gin and tonic induced snooze.   Mom didn’t really want to bother to learn it.  Though I tried to explain that she could have all of her files in a nice neat filing system in a computer, she still didn’t like anything about it.  I asked her to visualize her filing system in the computer as a bank of filing cabinets; each containing a subject, and further there would be sub-files under those headings.  I could see her head swimming.  “Mom, Everything can be contained neatly in this system without taking up any floor space.”  She really just wanted her old manual typewriter and a stack of typing paper.  I sighed deeply, and was acutely aware that I was wasting my time.  Though I failed to convince them of the conveniences of having a computer, I had mild success in interesting them in an E-Phone.  Though they were  interested, it was short-lived, in that they couldn’t get the hang of checking their e-messages from us.  So, they seldom answered any of our “e-mails”.   However, they did finally get the hang of cell phones.

That having been said, here we are in 2010; baby boomers that we are; installing the latest electronic technology into our homes, brains and well-beings.  God forbid if we should miss out on a message or information pertinent to our peace and well-being.  As of last week, we have yet another piece of the latest electronic equipment in our house.  The Royster bought himself a new 24” Sony Vaio touch screen computer.  It came in one box, and there were a total of four pieces; the monitor/computer, the wireless mouse, wireless keyboard, and a remote control, so that we could watch Blue Ray movies on this computer.  

We are babyboomers, and accept this advancement as another cross to bear.  Won’t we all be better off?  How did we ever live without all of these electronic gadgets?  Rotary telephones and televisions with big knobs for adjustments were the “modern technology” while I was growing up, unless you want to count dishwashers and garbage disposals modern technology for that era of 1948 through 1966.  After that, computers were just being introduced into businesses and not for private homes yet.

It is what it is!  What else can I say?  Change happens.  You either accept it, or you don’t.  In our case it’s happening over and over again.   We are now a wireless household, including phones, T.V.s and computers.  We each have cell phones (of course), iPods, and we each have our own wireless computers.  We both love music, though The Royster takes it to a new level.  He’s making sure that we have a mode of music for each computer, each room of the house, including the garage and the deck in the back yard and each vehicle.  Who woulda thunk it back in the 60’s, when we were proud of our 8 track tape players?

When we go into Fry’s, The Royster has to make a special promenade around the speaker section of the store.  He’s particularly impressed with the tiny little Bose speakers.  For the past twenty plus years, I have observed him drooling over electronic equipment.  I know that that if he touches the merchandise, he will fondle it, thereby ensuring that he will be buying it.   I suspect he’s secretly thinking of a way to make all the toilets in the house musical.  Sit down on the toilet seat and you trigger the toilet stereo.  Imagine, if you will, Bachman Turner Overdrive blaring out Taking Care of Business just as you sit down.

Since this last purchase of the Sony Vaio computer, things have been tense around here for sure.  From experience, I could guess this transition from the old computer upstairs would not go without a few traumatic glitches.  It’s never gone smoothly .  I guess the smoothest transition was when The Santa-Royster got me this wonderful Sony Vaio laptop for this past Christmas.

I digress.  The transferring of files from the old computer started out smoothly enough.  I knew to leave him alone, but be available to help if he asked for it.  The problems started when he started trying to install the programs that we use.  Quicken would NOT cooperate.  There was just no way.   After much scrapping, we found a phone contact number for tech help that he finally called.  The guy really wasn’t supposed to help him with this particular problem, as he was to pass it on to a more specialized person, uhh … for a fee.  But he did help, and very cheerfully at that.   The Royster was very pleased.

This process of transferring information continued on throughout the next few days….frustration after frustration.  I had been tempted to take him bottled water and a pillow, but fought that urge, knowing that it wouldn't be helpful.  The best thing for me to do was to leave him alone, and listen patiently to his laments.  Comments were not required, nor solicited … just listening. 

Last night, as soon as he came home from work, he trotted upstairs to install the final programs.  I left him alone until dinner was ready, and he reluctantly came down. He was pale and gaunt.  I could tell he’d been struggling.   As soon as dinner was over, he went back to his Computer Cave.  Hours went by, and I finally showered and got into bed.  I dozed, thinking he’d be down soon.  Sure enough he came down and almost in tears.  “I’ve ruined my new computer!  It's just ruined ... I just know it!”  Apparently, while installing a disk burning program, several programs and files just flat disappeared.  How totally devastating, to think that he would have to do it all over again, that is, IF the computer was not completely ruined.  I listened and told him that I didn’t think he had ruined his computer.  He was completely inconsolable.  His heart was breaking.  He went back to his Computer Cave to brood and fret.

Sure enough, just a little after 11 p.m. he came trotting in, almost glowing in the dark.  I woke with a start Oh, my Gawd!  He’s fixed it!  “I fixed it!”  He glowed.  What a relief.  I really wouldn’t have know what to say or where to hide if his brand new computer had truly been ruined.  I listened while he gave a gleeful blow-by-blow and step-by-step account of how he had fixed the ruined computer.  “I’m so happy, I could just shit!” he said.

I was so relieved that I would not be driving him to the hospital, that I almost completely forgot about the wireless Canon printer that he purchased the same day he bought the computer.  He’d still need to hook that up and install it in the newly saved wireless computer.  I didn’t have the heart to mention it.  Instead, I just let him expound on how he had saved the computer from total ruin, until he finally dropped off to sleep….still muttering with a smile on his face, “I fixed it!  I fixed it!  I fixed it!  I fixed……”